Using the "Distress Tolerance" Skill
Willingness
What is willingness? The knowledge that you are a connected piece of a larger puzzle and also a willingness to commitment to be actively participating in this puzzle. In a way, it's about your attitude that you have in life. Doing things skillfully is willingness. Not doing so, just letting life pass you by not caring, that's willfulness.
The opposite side is willfulness. This is where you say, "forget about life" or the larger puzzle; where you don't participate and refuse to be a piece of the bigger picture.
A great metaphor is it being like the "terrible 2's" or "horrible 3's". It's the refusal to accept what is or was.
So, obviously, we can see how hurtful this could be to ourselves. Therefore, we would want to change that thought pattern.
Here's 4 ways to do that:
1. Notice what you are seeing, feeling and thinking
2. Radically accept it-like it or not, it's happening
3. Turn your mind towards acceptance of the situation just being and towards willingness to keep participating no matter what
4. Try a willing posture, like unclenching you fists, sit up tall-not slouched, have open arms instead of crossed in front of you in a defensive pose
Willingness
What is willingness? The knowledge that you are a connected piece of a larger puzzle and also a willingness to commitment to be actively participating in this puzzle. In a way, it's about your attitude that you have in life. Doing things skillfully is willingness. Not doing so, just letting life pass you by not caring, that's willfulness.
The opposite side is willfulness. This is where you say, "forget about life" or the larger puzzle; where you don't participate and refuse to be a piece of the bigger picture.
A great metaphor is it being like the "terrible 2's" or "horrible 3's". It's the refusal to accept what is or was.
So, obviously, we can see how hurtful this could be to ourselves. Therefore, we would want to change that thought pattern.
Here's 4 ways to do that:
1. Notice what you are seeing, feeling and thinking
2. Radically accept it-like it or not, it's happening
3. Turn your mind towards acceptance of the situation just being and towards willingness to keep participating no matter what
4. Try a willing posture, like unclenching you fists, sit up tall-not slouched, have open arms instead of crossed in front of you in a defensive pose